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    New Haunt for Polk

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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sun Jun 07, 2015 5:24 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:The Bad nerd Reviews Un-Nerdy Movies:

    Pitch Perfect 2

    Pitch Perfect 2 is a sloppy mess of a movie with a few decent characters and one or two relatively funny lines. As even people who know nothing about anything know, the movie starts with Rebel Wilson (Fat Amy) splitting her pants on stage and helplessly rotating until her crotchal area is in full view of President Obama and his family.

    Movie logic means that this  wardrobe malfunction gets her a capella group expelled from a cappella competition, national ridicule, shame.  Polk wonders if one of the slender, cute girls in the group had split her pants would such an outrage have occurred?  I call it "The Melissa McCarthy Effect".  The fat person in a movie will do something clumsy and/or stupid and the repercussions of that clumsy stupidness are proportionate to the fat person's body mass index.

    A loophole means that their singing group can still compete in an international a cappella competition (they have those?)  and this bunch of girls whose names I do not know vow to redeem themselves.  Oh and also Katy Sagal is there playing the mother of a young ingenue who wants to join the group.  Of course new girl is a Taylor Swift-like songwriting genius.  She joins Fat Amy (the one who's name I know) and the 28 to 30 year-old college "senior" who lands an internship with a bigshot music producer.  Rounding out the group are:

    Offensive stereotype lesbian group member, a chunky black girl with who wears army fatigues and who's first lines in the film are basically "I'm a lesbian, in case you can't read stereotype"

    Offensive stereotype Columbian group member, a perky latina who's first line of dialogue, I shit you not, is "I had diarrhea for seven years."

    Offensive stereotype Asian girl with long hair and long straight bangs.  She says very little, but at an opportune moment reveals that she has ninja training.

    A cast of nearly identical cute white girls I couldn't really tell apart.


    This plucky group somehow manages to fall on their faces at every opportunity. Invited to a mysterious basement sing-off, the lose the grand prize (a forty-two thousand dollar Dave & Busters gift card) because OOPS they accidentally mixed in an original song by Innocent into the mix of 90s hip-hop standards.

    Also--

    Fat Amy manages to alienate the nerdy boy a cappella singer who loves her.
    Music Intern girl manages to impress her tough music producer boss by doing a Christmas song mashup with Snoop Dog (randomness alert!)
    Music Intern Girl then manages to disappoint boss by providing him an audition tape of nothing but other mashups. ("I liked what you did before-- never do it again because I will hate it")
    And those are, as far as I remember, the only characters who contribute anything to the story at all.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sun Jun 07, 2015 5:16 pm

    The Bad nerd Reviews Un-Nerdy Movies:

    Pitch Perfect 2

    Pitch Perfect 2 is a sloppy mess of a movie with a few decent characters and one or two relatively funny lines. As even people who know nothing about anything know, the movie starts with Rebel Wilson (Fat Amy) splitting her pants on stage and helplessly rotating until her crotchal area is in full view of President Obama and his family.

    Movie logic means that this wardrobe malfunction gets her a capella group expelled from a cappella competition, national ridicule, shame. Polk wonders if one of the slender, cute girls in the group had split her pants would such an outrage have occurred? I call it "The Melissa McCarthy Effect". The fat person in a movie will do something clumsy and/or stupid and the repercussions of that clumsy stupidness are proportionate to the fat person's body mass index.

    A loophole means that their singing group can still compete in an international a cappella competition (they have those?) and this bunch of girls whose names I do not know vow to redeem themselves. Oh and also Katy Sagal is there playing the mother of a young ingenue who wants to join the group. Of course new girl is a Taylor Swift-like songwriting genius. She joins Fat Amy (the one who's name I know) and the 28 to 30 year-old college "senior" who lands an internship with a bigshot music producer. Rounding out the group are:

    Offensive stereotype lesbian group member, a chunky black girl with who wears army fatigues and who's first lines in the film are basically "I'm a lesbian, in case you can't read stereotype"

    Offensive stereotype Columbian group member, a perky latina who's first line of dialogue, I shit you not, is "I had diarrhea for seven years."

    Offensive stereotype Asian girl with long hair and long straight bangs. She says very little, but at an opportune moment reveals that she has ninja training.

    A cast of nearly identical cute white girls I couldn't really tell apart.

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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sun Jun 07, 2015 4:47 pm

    kegs wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:So am I the last living cell in this dead body?

    (last living cell in dead body courtesy of the Dick Van Dyke Show.)

    No. No you are not.

    Are you sure? Because it seems pretty quiet round here.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sun Jun 07, 2015 6:26 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:So am I the last living cell in this dead body?

    (last living cell in dead body courtesy of the Dick Van Dyke Show.)

    No. No you are not.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 10:46 pm

    So am I the last living cell in this dead body?

    (last living cell in dead body courtesy of the Dick Van Dyke Show.)
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 10:16 pm

    Well I had to do something...different...today.

    After realizing that my district manager has been manipulating all of us store managers-- telling someone, for example, that there have been numerous customer complaints. That our corporate HR department has become concerned... That jobs are in jeopardy over (insert bogus issue here).

    The guy is acting like an abusive boyfriend-- isolating people and making them think he's the only thing between them and being thrown out on the street.

    But also I think he may be on cocaine or meth. He came to the store a couple of weeks ago in a very hyper and agitated state. Made a lot of loud noise in the back room. And passed around his phone with a picture of HIS PENIS on it. Yesterday one of the big bosses visited my store and talked to my other manager. Today I spoke up as well. Had to write up a statement. Bad DM should be gone on Monday.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sat Jun 06, 2015 4:48 pm

    Arrgh!
    I seems I'm going to have to take my pet to the vet to be euthanized. Must be the age. I've had it for over 20 years.
    It doesn't move, doesn't eat, doesn't even respond to anything.




    I'm going to miss that pet rock.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sat Jun 06, 2015 1:10 pm

    NebulaJack wrote:
    NebulaJack wrote:Mornin' guys. Yesterday was about as crappy a time sign waiving as I expected, and today looks to be much the same. I don't mind the heat so much, I wear a superman ball cap to keep the sun out've my eyes, and sunscreen works to keep from getting burnt. The allergy inducing pollen though is killin' me. Itchy eyes, constant sneezing, it's fuckin' hell.

    On the plus side, I started the 5th book in the Discworld series on my iPod yesterday. Good stuff.

    And off I go for another day of sneezing and sweating. Pray for me!

    Wear some swimming goggles to block the pollen. Also, you've done been prayed for. Next time I'd be specific as to which 'god' you request. Cthulhu loves you. (But only as a side-dish).
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    NebulaJack
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by NebulaJack on Sat Jun 06, 2015 1:06 pm

    NebulaJack wrote:Mornin' guys. Yesterday was about as crappy a time sign waiving as I expected, and today looks to be much the same. I don't mind the heat so much, I wear a superman ball cap to keep the sun out've my eyes, and sunscreen works to keep from getting burnt. The allergy inducing pollen though is killin' me. Itchy eyes, constant sneezing, it's fuckin' hell.

    On the plus side, I started the 5th book in the Discworld series on my iPod yesterday. Good stuff.

    And off I go for another day of sneezing and sweating. Pray for me!
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    NebulaJack
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by NebulaJack on Sat Jun 06, 2015 12:23 pm

    Mornin' guys. Yesterday was about as crappy a time sign waiving as I expected, and today looks to be much the same. I don't mind the heat so much, I wear a superman ball cap to keep the sun out've my eyes, and sunscreen works to keep from getting burnt. The allergy inducing pollen though is killin' me. Itchy eyes, constant sneezing, it's fuckin' hell.

    On the plus side, I started the 5th book in the Discworld series on my iPod yesterday. Good stuff.
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    Patch
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by Patch on Sat Jun 06, 2015 8:56 am

    Morning campers. Two more days till I'm off to Shreveport. Today my youngest has flag football games. So I'll be enjoying some sunshine
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sat Jun 06, 2015 8:25 am

    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:I was the one complaining about the notifications. IT WAS MEEEEE!!!

    I thought so. But then I thought maybe Arkay also complained.
    Anyway, your "IT WAS MEEE!" reminded me of  it was meeee!
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by theIllustriousDrGonzo on Sat Jun 06, 2015 8:16 am

    I was the one complaining about the notifications. IT WAS MEEEEE!!!
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sat Jun 06, 2015 7:40 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:

    Let's see if we can irritate Arkay with a thousand notifications from this haunt again.

    Well that's one. So this would be two. 998 to go!
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 7:31 am

    kegs wrote:Chaka when the walls fell?

    Also, good morning peoples!

    They actually invented a Pacuni language for the show. Syntax, vocabulary and everything. And the Marshal family didn't automatically understand Chaka. They figured out what he was saying bit by bit. It was really an ambitious show, especially considering it was never meant to be anything but a Saturday morning cartoon that most of us little bastards wouldn't appreciate.

    Also Good Morning Kegs.

    Let's see if we can irritate Arkay with a thousand notifications from this haunt again.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by kegs on Sat Jun 06, 2015 7:17 am

    Chaka when the walls fell?

    Also, good morning peoples!
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 6:49 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:Who wrote Land Of The Lost?

    Because I want to thank him/her/them.

    In last week's episode, the Marshals meet Chaka, and have to put a splint on his broken leg after rescuing him.  On this week's episode, Chaka is still wearing the splint.  And he's still afraid of them.

    Anyway this episode is called "The Sleestak God" and I think this is the first appearance of the lizard/insect pointy-headed ones.

    Also.  DAMN you Village Voice media for killing the weekend community.

    Did Chaka just call the big triceratops "Amanda"?

    Sign says "Beware of Sleestak"

    Chaka goes nuts "Sareesataka!!!"

    And the Sleestak are outside in the daytime?  Hmmm. They mythology must not be fully realized yet.

    Sleestak are like the Sith.  Always three there are. No more. No less.

    "Besasa!" means magic I think.

    Now Holly and Will are suspended in a net to be lowered into the pit and sacrificed to the Sleestak god.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 6:47 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:Who wrote Land Of The Lost?

    Because I want to thank him/her/them.

    In last week's episode, the Marshals meet Chaka, and have to put a splint on his broken leg after rescuing him.  On this week's episode, Chaka is still wearing the splint.  And he's still afraid of them.

    Anyway this episode is called "The Sleestak God" and I think this is the first appearance of the lizard/insect pointy-headed ones.

    Also.  DAMN you Village Voice media for killing the weekend community.

    Did Chaka just call the big triceratops "Amanda"?

    Sign says "Beware of Sleestak"

    Chaka goes nuts "Sareesataka!!!"

    And the Sleestak are outside in the daytime?  Hmmm. They mythology must not be fully realized yet.

    Sleestak are like the Sith. Always three there are. No more. No less.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 6:47 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    James.k.Polk wrote:Who wrote Land Of The Lost?

    Because I want to thank him/her/them.

    In last week's episode, the Marshals meet Chaka, and have to put a splint on his broken leg after rescuing him.  On this week's episode, Chaka is still wearing the splint.  And he's still afraid of them.

    Anyway this episode is called "The Sleestak God" and I think this is the first appearance of the lizard/insect pointy-headed ones.

    Also.  DAMN you Village Voice media for killing the weekend community.

    Did Chaka just call the big triceratops "Amanda"?

    Sign says "Beware of Sleestak"

    Chaka goes nuts "Sareesataka!!!"

    And the Sleestak are outside in the daytime? Hmmm. They mythology must not be fully realized yet.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 6:45 am

    James.k.Polk wrote:Who wrote Land Of The Lost?

    Because I want to thank him/her/them.

    In last week's episode, the Marshals meet Chaka, and have to put a splint on his broken leg after rescuing him.  On this week's episode, Chaka is still wearing the splint.  And he's still afraid of them.

    Anyway this episode is called "The Sleestak God" and I think this is the first appearance of the lizard/insect pointy-headed ones.

    Also.  DAMN you Village Voice media for killing the weekend community.

    Did Chaka just call the big triceratops "Amanda"?
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Sat Jun 06, 2015 6:40 am

    Who wrote Land Of The Lost?

    Because I want to thank him/her/them.

    In last week's episode, the Marshals meet Chaka, and have to put a splint on his broken leg after rescuing him. On this week's episode, Chaka is still wearing the splint. And he's still afraid of them.

    Anyway this episode is called "The Sleestak God" and I think this is the first appearance of the lizard/insect pointy-headed ones.

    Also. DAMN you Village Voice media for killing the weekend community.
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by NebulaJack on Fri Jun 05, 2015 9:29 pm

    James.k.Polk wrote:
    NebulaJack wrote:Evenin' guys. Today was extra polleny at work. Pausing to sneeze while waiving a sign is kind of a pain in the ass, especially when I have to do it half a dozen times a shift.

    Hi Nebs.  Wonder if you've thought about that mobile game we talked about.  I don't have time or the expertise to develop it, but I think it could be a fun game.

    I've been having a bit've a creative dry spell lately, but I haven't forgotten about it. When I can work up the energy to work on a project That's one of the ones on the top of my get to list.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Fri Jun 05, 2015 9:27 pm

    NebulaJack wrote:Evenin' guys. Today was extra polleny at work. Pausing to sneeze while waiving a sign is kind of a pain in the ass, especially when I have to do it half a dozen times a shift.

    Hi Nebs. Wonder if you've thought about that mobile game we talked about. I don't have time or the expertise to develop it, but I think it could be a fun game.
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    NebulaJack
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by NebulaJack on Fri Jun 05, 2015 9:23 pm

    Evenin' guys. Today was extra polleny at work. Pausing to sneeze while waiving a sign is kind of a pain in the ass, especially when I have to do it half a dozen times a shift.
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    James.k.Polk
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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

    Post by James.k.Polk on Fri Jun 05, 2015 8:50 pm

    rkwsuperstar wrote:
    theIllustriousDrGonzo wrote:I swear if I keep getting email notifications from y'all's nonsense over here......

    Why do you expect something other than nonsense?

    To be honest, we miss you when you're not here.


    well


    I miss you when you're not here. I can't speak for these other guys.

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    Re: New Haunt for Polk

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